Selfless

"She does him good not evil

All the days of her life"

Proverbs 31:12

I love the thought behind this verse not only for the wife but for the husband too. It's this idea that her life is no longer about what's best for her but what's best for them. Sometimes it's a good thing in the husband's eyes sometimes he's not a fan of it but her job is to do what's best for him. It's not just something she does once and while either but rather it's something that she is going to do all of her life. She is going to make it her goal to make sure that she is make decisions that are best for him. Life is no longer about just her or just him but rather about them.

In the same way we as men are called to be Christ for the wife. We literally give up things in our life to show what love is. The job that is placed in front of the husband is to make love more than a word to the wife just as Jesus did for the church. In order to that we as Christian men have to daily die to the selfishness we have in us. Christ was our example with His father and you can especially hear it when He is in the Garden of Gethsemane crying out to his Father to take this cup from Him but ONLY if it's His will. Jesus sacrificed His will for the will of His Father and husbands are called to do the same in many areas of our lives.

Why?

"The question of following Jesus maybe isn't so much about how we follow Jesus...maybe the question that most people struggle with is why? Why should I follow this Jesus if this road is so narrow and difficult, why should I follow Him?"

Francis Chan

 As a Christian why should I follow this Jesus the bible talks about? Is it because that's what the church tells me so I should listen? Is it because our parents say it's a good idea and He gives us a great role model? Francis Chan says that if he is perfectly honest he follows Jesus because He said that He was coming back and is going to judge the earth. A very valid response in my opinion as he points out the book of Revelation is terrifying to say the least. A big reason why we as Christian's follow God is due to two things in my opinion. His mighty power and acknowledgement that He is literally in control of everything along with realizing the love He has sent in the form of His Son Jesus Christ. His power and His love drive me into trusting Him with my life. It’s these two things that call me to call Him ‘Lord’ with confidence understanding that it means He’s master over my entire life, even if that means laying down my life. Jesus never promised His disciples that it was going to be an easy road rather He said it was going to be incredibly difficult. The one thing that gets us through this life is knowing He is with us throughout the entire journey.

In the book of Daniel there is a story most Christian’s have heard over and over. In chapter 3 of Daniel we find 3 men whose lives are not going the way they pictured them to go. They were put into positions that would test them and build them into the people that God wanted them to be. Think about it for a second the integrity that these men had. Just put yourself in their shoes! Taken from their home and put under an authority figure who is worshiping other gods and then you’re told that if you don’t bend your knee to this idol that he made your going to be thrown in a furnace in front of everyone. This is the path the Lord took them on as Godly men! They stood up and refused to bow down understanding fully that this would probably lead them to their physical death. They could have sank into the background and just bowed with everyone else and probably got away with it being in a strange place but they couldn’t do it and be right with the Lord. Following the Lord led these 3 men into a furnace, in what should have been their death. Now the Lord did save these 3 men and instead of burning in the furnace they stood with Jesus in the fire. The point that these men and everyone watching, including the King, saw through their obedience? It’s better to be in the fire with Jesus than outside the fire without him. God was showing everyone something in this piece of scripture whether it be the spectator watching, the King raging, or the men standing tall God was speaking! Through the obedience in these men’s lives God showed himself in the bleakest of situations  You see the reason I follow Jesus with my life is that I know that I’d rather be in this world walking the narrow road with him than I would walking the big wide road without Him. It’s worth following Jesus because when you do He walks this road with you. Speaking about this road of following Jesus Francis Chan puts it this way.

“If you follow me it’s not going to be this life of luxury, in fact I don’t even know where I’m going to sleep tonight and not only that people are going to hate you for following me and not only that there’s going to be all these temptations in the world that you’re going to have to fight and all these things and even your own family might be against you. If you follow me you might even end up getting crucified like I’m going to get crucified.” See sometimes we’re not that honest with people. We try to talk people into following Jesus by saying “Hey if you follow Jesus you can be forgiven, you can go to heaven, you can have intimacy with God.” and all those things are true but we neglect this other part that Jesus was very upfront about saying “Look it’s very very difficult to follow Me there’s this wide road that most are going to take this wide and easy road but there’s this narrow road that leads to life very few people will find and it’s a hard path” He says but He also says “I am worth it. I am so worth it.”

He is worth it because He doesn’t make you take this narrow road without help. He walks it with you daily and desires for you to lean on His strength as you combat this world. He gives us a choice of these two roads. One is going to be incredibly difficult but while that may be the case the other one, the easier one, is going to be taken without Him. The road I’m on may be a dangerous one where God could ask me in a minute to do something that scares me to death but at the same time I know He will be with me through it all. That’s why it’s worth every heartache, every pitfall, and every loss because I know that my God is with me! The question is do you believe that it’s better to be “in the fire” with Him than outside it without Him? 

So Good

"..."single ruse." By that I mean the tendency on the part of some (certainly not all) single young people to think that what they really need is to find "the one." Once their life mate is found, they assume, everything else will fall into place. Their loneliness, their insecurity, their worries about their own significance- all this and more will somehow mystically melt away in the fire of marital passion.

And, for a very short season, this might appear to be the case. Infatuation can be an intoxicating drug that temporarily covers up any number of inner weaknesses.

But marriage is a spotlight showing us that our search for another human being to "complete" us is misguided. When disillusionment breaks through, we have one of two choices: Dump our spouse and become infatuated with somebody new, or seek to understand the message behind the disillusionment-that we should seek our significance, meaning, and purpose in our Creator rather than in another human being.
Approached in the right way, marriage can cause us to reevaluate our dependency on other humans for our spiritual nourishment, and direct us to nurture our relationship with God instead. No human being can love us the way we long to be loved; it is just not possible for another human to reach and alleviate the spiritual ache that God has placed in all of us.  "

Have you ever felt something so strongly that when you try to put it into words it makes absolutely no sense? You fumble over the words in your mind but they escape you. You find yourself falling short time and time again trying to explain something that is incredibly important to you. That's how I felt with this passage. I've felt exactly this and it's something I still deal with. This is what I've been praying for so long and Mr. Thomas put it in such an eloquent way I had to share. As much as I don't want my life to be dictated by the idea of searching for "the one" to meet a need they can't meet, it's not an easy task. It's not an easy task by any means for me, considering that I feel the Lord has put such a desire to be a Godly husband and Godly Father. It's the truth though and it's also a temptation ,I believe, we all face. We as fallen people desperately seek to fill the void left during the fall that is inside of us all. It doesn't have to be "the one" but in many cases it is and it goes completely against the idea that Galatians 1:10 addresses.

"For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ."

As Christians our identity can't be found in another person but rather it must be found in the Lord. We can't live our lives to please other people but rather our main goal should be to please the Lord with our lives (2 Cor. 5:9). As a single person your at spot number two on the "what's most important" list behind God. When you take marriage into account however you become at the very highest number three. So far I must say I highly recommend the book "Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas. It's truly not only a book about marriage alone but a book about relationships in our lives. Some are clearly directed towards married life but the idea of dying to self and meeting others needs before your own is a biblical one we don't need to only apply to marriage but also to our brothers and sisters in Christ.  

Proverbs 31:11

"The heart of her husband trusts in her,.."

Proverbs 31:11a

As I pour over these scriptures I can't help but praying them. Honestly, for me it's obvious that God put this in scripture for a reason to show what characteristics we as men should be looking for in woman. I find myself going back to these verses a lot lately so I think it's only appropriate that my blogs reflect what I think the Lord is showing me in and through His word.

The first part of the verse is not only speaking to the woman but also to the man. This kind of woman clearly has the character that her husband can trust. What an important word trust is especially in a relationship between two fallen people. The man's heart doesn't need to worry about the faithfulness or how devoted his wife is because her life and actions reveal that to him. But how does the man get this point? The man trusts her with his heart because he sees how devoted and faithful she is to the Lord. Her life makes it obvious to the man that he can trust her as she trusts the Lord. The man is also spoken to through this verse as well. The woman could be exemplifying everything it is to be a Godly woman but the man still couldn't trust her. The man's heart needs to be right before he can trust her. The man's heart needs to be God's heart so he can truly trust her. Trust is the foundation that a relationship is built on but not the trust between the two people but rather the trust they have in the Lord. When the man is trusting in God his heart is going to be right and in turn trust his wife. When the woman is truly trusting in God her life is going to show that and it will be seen by the man. 

Happily Ever After.

"Why do you call me, 'Lord, Lord.' and do not do what I say?"

Luke 6:46

My heart breaks over this scripture. Not because I believe I'm not doing as He says to do, though through this study my eyes have viewed some areas in my life that this is the case, but rather for people in this world. It especially breaks for those who call themselves believers. It's amazing to me how so much of the church has this idea that they can have Christ but make up their own rules as it talks about in 1st John. Jesus' words are so crystal clear in most of the passages we read yet, we want to bend them to say something else when he comes off very stern.  Jesus didn't play around with following Him either you did or you didn't. He was so clear that when we as people accept Christ that the road before us is not going to be an easy one. 

"Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wise and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it. For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it."

Matthew 7:13-14

Jesus paints this beautiful picture in Matthew 7 and my mind immediately jumps to the movie Beauty and the Beast. Yes I know, I'm a nerd but bear with me here. Maurice, Belle's father, is traveling and he comes to a fork in the road he’s faced with a choice many characters in stories are faced with. One way look’s beautiful and easy to travel while the other is dimly lit and dangerous looking. The choice seems obvious right? Well he doesn't choose that path he actually chooses the rough path that no one in their right mind would choose. What the heck was that dude thinking was my instant reaction, which was his horse’s reaction too actually. If you've been lucky enough to see this work of art you would be quick to jump to the conclusion "Yea he took the scary road and look what happened to him! He got taken captive by a beast and if that wasn't bad enough his daughter takes his place and now he has to live without his daughter!" I totally agree with that, yes it looked bad, but have you ever stopped to think that his decision to take the dangerous looking road led to the greatest happiness in not only his life but also his daughters too? Because the man went down the road less traveled it resulted in some hard times, temporary loss, despair, and loneliness among other feelings and circumstance but all that didn't matter when the man got to see what going down that road led to. Spoiler alert the girl falls in love with the beast which breaks the spell of him looking like a beast and they live happily ever after. As stupid and silly as that seems it's a perfect analogy for our walk with the Lord that is spoken about in Matthew 7. 

Jesus is saying don't choose the gate that looks the safest or the easiest because it's going to lead you to destruction. He's calling us not to live this life for ourselves! He's calling us not to live this life by our own rules and to not be captured by our own desires but instead to go through the small gate. The smaller gate might not be as glamorous as the big amazing gate. It's not going to be as easy as the big gate and it's going to stretch you. You’re going to make decisions people are not only going to disagree with but just flat out not understand. The promise for taking this smaller more dangerous road however is Life. Eternal life, with Jesus! This eternal life starts when you understand that He is Lord and you are not. We do get heaven but we are eternal beings right now and if we are on this path our destination is eternity with Him!

This is not an easy topic to write about at all. It beats me up and breaks my heart to know that people I love more than anything else in this world are on the wrong path. It breaks my heart and beats me up to know that some of my youth group kids are on this path and believe that they are on the other. It scares me for them and it drives me to preach the world of God completely and to preach about a complete view of Jesus. 

"Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My father who is in heaven will enter. Many will say to Me on that day, 'Lord, Lord', did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast our demons, and in Your name perform many miracles?"

"And I will declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from me who practice lawlessness.'

Matthew 7:21-23

Jesus isn't playing around with these words. He's looking for people who follow Him not themselves. He is looking for people who are completely surrendered to Him and not themselves. He is looking for people who are led by Him and not by themselves. He is looking for people who follow His rules and not their own! Jesus says these are the characteristics of a believer. It's so easy for us as people to walk around and say we know Jesus because we've HEARD things He said. It's easy to walk around and SAY that I'm a Christian but the only opinion that really matters is if Jesus calls you one. That's the question you need to ask yourself after all of this myself included! Many people can look at what I do and say "yea that's a Christian" but if Jesus doesn't then I should be worried. We can fool many people but I'm not going to be in Hell saying well at least so and so thought I was a Christian. 

Do you understand that Jesus wants your life. He is not going to barter with you or negotiate about what He wants. Look at the Matthew 7:23 "And I will DECLARE to them,". He's not a God that negotiates with you once you’re done here, He's going to tell you. Matthew 10:37-39 sums this up better than I could ever think of doing.

"He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me; and he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who does not take his cross and follow after Me is not worthy of Me. He who has found his life will lose it, and he who has lost his life for my sake will find it."

Matthew 10:37-39

Very stern words by Jesus. If you love people more than Me then you’re not worthy of Me because I'm the one that put them in your life in the first place. That's what he's saying about our Parents and Kids and that is tough. The next part is where I think we have the most trouble. He's saying if you value your life more than Me then you’re not worthy of Me. He's saying listen if you’re not willing to pick up your cross and be crucified with Me than your not worthy of Me. If you’re not ready to go with Me and die with Me than you’re not worthy of Me.  Are we ready to do that? Are we ready to call Him Lord knowing what that means? It's by no means an easy road that lay ahead for those who answer Yes but the prize is worth every second of it. The opportunity to be called Son's of God. The opportunity to be called Royal Priests. The opportunity to live this life with the creator of the universe on your side! Romans 8:31 says it this way "If God is for us, then who can be against us," and it’s the idea that the power we have in God makes these problems we have in life seem so much smaller! The greatest gift God has ever given us is Love in the form of His son and what He asks for, is your entire life. That's the happy ending just like in the Beauty and the Beast story I told. It may not always be fun and easy but in the end NO ONE will regret  what they went through, what they gave up, what they sacrificed for God because when we see Him and hear the words "Well done good and faithful servant" and the kingdom of heaven becomes ours everything we went through will be worth it. Every pitfall and hurt will be worth it. Giving up your life will be worth it and as a Christian walking now I can say with confidence it IS worth it.

Water day and God is good

So our amazing college and career group got the opportunity to go to Parkcrest community and have a water day for the kids. It was a blast and the opportunity to serve those kids was such a humbling experience. For me it just reconfirmed things the Lord has been telling me for a little while now regarding the ministry's he wants me to focus on growing in. He’s put the burden on my heart to start preparing to be an amazing dad and an amazing husband and I can actually see situations He places in my life to mold me in these areas. From scripture that lights my heart on fire to a silly water day with a bunch of kids running around and wanting piggyback rides. It’s just amazing how blessed I am to have people in my life that build me up and help put me in the right direction. We were talking on Wednesday night at college and career it really hit me that my walk with the Lord may be the strongest it’s ever been and I’m more in love with the Lord than I’ve ever been and a big part of that is because of our group. The people that God has put into our college and career group are honestly some of the most talented and kind hearted people I’ve met. The fellowship we have in that group is really second to none and it’s amazing how compatible we all seem to be personality wise. I honestly can’t wait to see what God has in store for this group because never have I felt more part of a group then with these people. God is good.